Monday, September 16, 2013

Living Intentionally

I love all you guys and gals.  :)  And for no particular reason, I just do.  Living intentionally is very important.  Our mindfulness, what we think about and how we think can easily be altered over time.  Altered if we don't always tend to think positively.  Which I don't always tend to think particularly positively, but I learn and I keep trying.  It's good to push up thoughts and questions in your mind like, how can I be loving right now?  How can I be helpful?  How can I care about someone?  Is there someone in my phone that could use a text of encouragement?  Some of you are really good at this, you're constantly lifting people up and encouraging others.  I love to see that.  Personally, I have some learning to do in that area.  I spent several years quite isolated from my peers, and a lot of this process of growth has been just learning to come out of my shell and help facilitate healthy friendships and family relations. 

Honestly, it's been exceedingly difficult for me.  I'm the kind of guy who walks around with a lot of fear in social situations.  That's slowly changing, but it's something I've dealt with my entire life.  A couple months of attempting to adjust my thinking isn't going to produce a complete and permanent adjustment.  Do you know what I mean?  These are deeply imbedded learned behavior.  And if you often happen to be an individual who's kind of a perfectionist, then it's easy to get frustrated with slow progress. 

Here's something I learned in recovery: I'm exactly where I'm suppose to be right at this exact moment.  I don't need to be exhausting myself during my down time constantly yearning for changes and growth.  This kind of growth develops over time.  Patience, right?  Long perseverance and endurance in this storm of life.